Natasha Sholl

COPYWRITING + COMMUNICATIONS + BRAND STRATEGY

Dr. Seuss, COVID-19 Edition

OH, THE PLACES YOU WON’T GO!

Congratulations!
At home you will stay.
You’re off to Great Places!
But just not today.

You have washed and you’ve scrubbed.
Your hands are so dry.
Two G&Ts by midday,
no rules to live by.
You’re not on your own, now we know what we know.
But only YOU can decide to STAY PUT and not go!

You’ll look down empty streets. Don’t go out, don’t you dare.
Be brave and say, “I don’t need to go there.”
Nurses exhausted, doctors run off their feet,
you’re too smart to go down even the funnest fun street.

And there are so many
you will want to go down.
But stay strong, stay on course,
postpone your trip out of town.

OH! THE PLACES YOU WON’T GO!

I’m sorry to say so,
but, sadly, it’s true,
NBN
and WiFi
will disconnect too.

You will get no reception
in a WiFi black zone.
And you’ll miss your Zoom meeting,
you’ll feel all alone.

You’ll hang up from FaceTime,
throw your phone with a thump,
and chances are, then,
you’ll feel down in a dump.

And when you’re in the dumps,
You’ll just have to carb-load.
Then livestream Pilates,
(The studio’s down the road).

You’ll be filled with despair,
so you’ll scroll and you’ll scroll.
No good comes from arguing with an Instagram troll.
You’ll scroll on for hours down a meme rabbit-hole,
headed, I fear, towards an inevitable place.

The Quarantine Place…

…for people just waiting.
Waiting for the virus to go
or vaccine to come, or the fear to go
or good news to come, or the restrictions to go
or the school bells to ring, or politicians to know
or waiting for the scientists’ Yes or No
or waiting not to feel so low.
Everyone is just waiting.

NO!
It’s not forever!
Someday we’ll escape,
all this waiting and staying.
We will visit the pubs,
where live music is playing.

Oh, the places we’ll go! There is fun to be done!
There are beaches to visit! Tinder dates in the sun!
But for now there is Netflix and Uber and Stan,
And maybe day-drinking or FaceTiming Gran.
Homeschool! You’ll homeschool like a pro, the best you
can be,
until it all turns to sh*t and they can just watch TV.

All Alone!
Isolated whether you like it or not,
alone will be something
you’ll be quite a lot.

But when you’re at home, there’s a very good chance
you’re saving the world (day 4 in the same yoga pants).
There are some, who would say that your hair should be washed,
but no one can smell you on WhatsApp, and you’re sloshed.

So at home we will stay,
though the weather be sunny.
At home we will stay,
though we’ve lost all our money.
At home we will stay,
no loo-roll for the dunny.

On and on time will drag,
and who knows for how far.
But we’re in this together,
whoever you are.

You’ll get frustrated, of course,
it’s natural you know.
You’ll get frustrated
with mixed messages from ScoMo.
But be sure when you’re bored,
and want to download an app,
remember that you,
cannot dance, cannot rap.
So get off TikTok before you embarrass yourself.
Guard your digital footprint like you would your health.

And will we succeed?
Yes! We will, indeed!
(98 and ¾ percent guaranteed.)

JUST, STAY AT HOME!

So…
be you a Doctor, a Nurse or a Teacher
Gen Y or a Boomer or Gen X (you leacher!),
We’re off to Great Places!
But just not today!
Our future is waiting.
Just stay home, please just stay!